Stepping off the beaten path
Sebastian Terry
Jumping naked from a plane. Number 58 in his list of 100 things to achieve in his life.
Sebastian Terry stepped away from his “standard blueprint” life at age 25. He wrote a “bucket list” that has led him on a 15-year journey of self-discovery. Forcing himself out of his comfort zone has enabled Seb to know himself and given him the confidence to be that person.
This story is for anyone needing the courage to live a life less “ordinary”.
THE NOMINATION
Michael Crossland, a “miracle” survivor of cancer, has faced life-and-death situations since he was first diagnosed at 11-months old. When I ask him to name one person who truly inspires him with their courage, he chooses his friend and fellow motivational speaker Sebastian Terry for his courage to take on personal challenges, without playing it safe.
Sebastian’s close mate died at a young age, and he thought to himself, “If I was to die, would I be happy with the life that I’ve lived?” And the answer was no. So, he decided to write down 100 things that he wanted to achieve before he dies and then set about doing them. And now he travels the world. He’s created a TV show. He’s created books. He’s one of the most in-demand speakers right now in the US.
He's had the courage to write a list of things he wants to achieve before he dies. He’s had the courage to pack up everything he has and move to the other side of the world. He’s had the courage to have people follow him around with a camera to film his every move because he knows that what he’s doing is of great value.
Seb challenges me to believe in myself because he demonstrates his own self belief.
I try and surround myself with great people. I decluttered a few years ago: not my clothes, not my shoes, but my friends. I needed to surround myself with people that were going to inspire me to back myself and have the courage to achieve my dreams. Seb challenges me to believe in myself because he demonstrates his own self-belief.
SEBASTIAN
I was just living that standard blueprint of life. Finished school in Sydney. Got a degree. Went backpacking. I never consciously thought about what I was doing or where I wanted to go. I was waiting for someone to tell me.
My friend passed when I was 25 and travelling in Canada. I remember thinking if I died today would I have regrets, would I do the same things? I realised almost immediately; I would change everything. I didn’t know myself. I didn’t know my values. I didn’t have any direction, no sense of purpose. I wasn’t happy.
So, I decided to make a list of things I hoped would make me feel good: in superficial and deeper ways, in simple and complex ways, in selfish and selfless ways. And that was how the list started.
The list became the skeleton of everything that I do.
It was then glaringly obvious what I had to do. I was back in Australia when I had an invitation to visit an inmate on death row in California (#12 on the list). I didn’t have a plan. I left with $9,000 and my credit card. Then I met some people in San Diego and they were going to this festival called Burning Man (#14 on the list). Checking things off the list became the skeleton of everything I would do, day to day, month to month and over the years.
Deliver a baby. #23 on The List.
The tough part was telling my parents and friends. My friends would sort of laugh at me. My Mom was disappointed because it didn’t match her expectations of what I should be doing as a 28-year-old with a degree. I went against the norm.
My mom was disappointed because I didn’t match her expectations of what I should be doing as a 28-year old man.
And of course, the money ran out quite quickly. So, I got a job working in a bar in Switzerland, trying to learn French and doing a few other things on my list. I was just making enough to live and then a documentary crew for Honda asked to do a documentary about me. I didn’t get paid, but it allowed me to keep doing these epic things. Random House reached out and asked me to write a book and I got paid an advance. The speaking thing started to happen at the same time and it just all worked out.
Be a TV weatherman,
#39 on The List.
I’ll admit that I did really think that if I did 100 things, I would be happy. Fifteen years on I realise that’s not the key to happiness. The real growth for me has come through getting closer to knowing who I am.
The real growth for me has come through getting closer to knowing who I am.
I’ve had to connect with other people, I’ve had to be lonely, I’ve had to step outside my comfort zone and really challenge myself mentally, emotionally, spiritually, physically. And all those things have given me a better picture of who I am. I’ve learned to understand myself and I’m more confident about being that person.
I don’t look at what I did or what I’m doing as courageous. A lot of people have that opinion of me, but I don’t see it that way. I suppose it takes courage to jump out of a plane (#58), or pose nude in front of an art class (#75) or walk across a country (#36) but to me that’s not the secret to what I do. I’m just blessed to have given myself permission to take action.
I’m just blessed to have given myself permission to take action.
In fact, I would simplify it and say that all it takes is action. I suppose it takes courage to take that first step, because it’s scary. But you know what? If we concentrate on our actions, those first steps, we often find that we’re far more capable that we thought.
Photographs provided by Sebastian Terry.
Want to know more?
You can find out more about Seb and The List on his website sebastianterry.com. His book, 100 Things What’s on Your List, is available from Penguin. For more on Michael Crossland’s story go to michaelcrossland.com